Ok, I'm finally on here and making a few changes to the Jackstock and Mules pages. A lot of it is really old information and photos, but I'll get it updated soon.  Also the classifieds will be updated soon.  Donkey and mule folks will probably only be interested in the Jackstock, Mules, and Classifieds pages, and maybe the Cooking page. Thanks for your patience.

Updated ads of  Gooseneck Trailer, mammoth jackstock and mules for sale. Click here to go to the Classifieds.

Things are pretty hectic here so there haven't been many website updates lately.

On this site you'll see photos and information of our mammoth jackstock, past and present. They are our private stock which has been kept out of the public eye. The big sorrel jennets we currently have are all related, all home-raised.  Some are daughters of the infamous Texas Red, and the others are daughters of them, sired by sons or grandsons of Texas Red.  These are true mammoths, ranging in size up to 16 hands and 1400#. They have been a consistent size for 30 years, not bred-up burros or cropouts. They produce offspring of consistent size and color.  Please follow the links above to see more.

The Cookbook page has some of my favorites (apple cake, apple crisp, canned meat, macaroni salad, etc.), and I hope to get some cool recipes from you guys too and put on there.
 

The Photo Album will eventually have pictures I've taken over the past 35 years of having jackstock and mules. Some are classics, such as rare photos I took of Jen Jack, Bully Boy, Texas Red, etc.

This site is not advertised anywhere.

Mule Joke Department:

An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning til night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot.

One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife began haranguing him again. Complain, nag, nag; it just went on and on.

All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet; caught her smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot.

At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement.

This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it.

So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with all the men.

The old farmer said, "Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in agreement."

"And what about the men?" the minister asked.

"They wanted to know if the mule was for sale."

There was this zebra who had lived her entire life in a zoo and was getting on a bit so the zoo keeper decided as a treat that she could spend her final years in bliss on a farm.

The zebra was so excited, she got to see this huge space with green grass and hill and trees and all these strange animals. She saw a big fat weird looking brown thing and ran up to it all excited, "Hi, I'm a zebra! What are you?"

"I'm a cow."

"Right, right. What do you do?"

"I make milk for the farmer."

"Cool." The zebra then saw this funny looking little white thing and ran over to it. "Hi, I'm a zebra. What are you?"

"I'm a chicken."

"Oh, right. What do you do?"

"I make eggs for the farmer."

"Right, great, see ya round." Then the zebra saw this very handsome beast that looked almost exactly like her without the stripes. She ran over to it and said, "Hi, I'm a zebra. What are you?"

"I am a Jack," said the donkey.

"Wow," said the zebra. "What do you do?"

"Take off your pajamas, darling, and I'll show you."

How to Worm your Mule:

1) Buy wormer paste.

2) Capture the wild beast -a.k.a- the mule.

3) Firmly grip lead rope in left/right hand (whichever you do not write with).

4) With your other hand insert wormer tube.

5) Pick yourself up off the ground and ask someone to hold your mule while you go to the emergency room to have your dislocated shoulder looked at.

6) Repeat steps 1-4, but duck this time as the back hooves somehow go flying past your head.

7) As your legs get twisted in the rope, try to stand up, only to have your legs pulled out from under you.

8) As soon as you spit out ALL the dirt you just ate, jump up and grab your mule.

9) Ponder why this is not working.

10) Repeat steps 1-4 and 6, but this time go home, change into a shirt that does not have apple- flavored wormer paste all over it and proceed to go to the feed store and buy another tube.

11) When you get back to the barn, see the manager's 10-year-old son walking over to you.

12) Let him take the worming tube from your hand, and watch in disbelief as he worms your mule without getting a single spot of the paste on himself, and there is no dirt on his face, and he's not in the emergency room.

13) Put your mule back in the barn and go home to your nice warm bed.

A COWBOY'S WRATH!

A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his mule had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY MULE?" he yelled with surprising force. No one answered. "ALRIGHT, I'M GONNA HAVE ANOTHA BEER, AND IF MY HOSS AIN'T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME I FINISH, I'M GONNA DO WHAT I DONE IN TEXAS! AND I DON'T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DONE IN TEXAS!"

Some of the locals shifted restlessly. He had another beer, walked outside, and his mule was back! He saddled up and started to ride out of town. The bartender left the bar and asked meekly, "Say partner, before you go... what happened in Texas?"

The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."

A Cure for Constipation
A farmer goes to the vet and says, "My mule is constipated." The vet replies, "Take one of these pills, put it in a long tube, insert the other end in the mule's behind, and blow the pill up there." The farmer comes back the next day, and he looks very sick. The vet says, "What happened?" The farmer responds, "The mule blew first."

Q. Do you know the difference between a Fairy Tale and A Cowboy Story? 
A. A Fairy Tale starts out "Once upon a time a long long time ago" 
A Cowboy Story starts out "This ain't no sh-- Joe".

An Old Man his Grandson and their mule named Hiney
Way back up in the hills lived an old man and his grandson. Being very poor and in need of supplies the old man decided to sell their old mule named Hiney. So the next morning the trio set off on the long trek down to the sale barn in the valley.

On the trail down, they passed the Widow Thompson's house who was entertaining her friend Mrs. Jones on the porch. The old man heard the two women commenting on how cruel the old man was to make his grandson walk when he could be riding. The old man not wanting to be thought of as cruel lifted his grandson onto the back of Hiney and continued on their way.

A while later the trio passed another cabin and they heard the comment, "look at that strong healthy young boy riding and making that old man walk". The old man not wanting anyone to think ill of his grandson ordered his grandson to dismount and the old man took his place atop Hiney.

Continuing on their way, they passed a country general store. Where several men were talking on the porch. Again comments were made, "Look at those fools, one riding and one walking. When both could be riding". Not wanting anyone to think that they were fools, the old man lifted his grandson up to ride behind him on Hiney.

Resuming their trek the three came to the outskirts of the village. Still a long way from their destination of the sale barn. When passing the elevator with several men gathered by the scale the old man overheard, "There goes two of the biggest idiots that I have ever seen. By the time they get that mule to the sale barn, he will be nothing but skin and bones. They should carry the mule instead of the mule carrying them". Not wanting anyone to think that he and his grandson were idiots, the old man and his grandson dismounted. They then, with great difficulty lifted Hiney up onto their shoulders and went on their way.

On their way to the sale barn, they came upon a rope bridge suspended over a very deep gorge. The sale barn was on the other side, so the old man, his grandson and Hiney continued on. Half way across, the bridge started to sway back and forth. The swaying became so violent that Hiney slipped from their shoulders and fell into the deep gorge and died when he hit the rocks below.
The moral of this story is that if you try to please everyone, you will probably end up losing your Hiney!

New Bride
A farmer was driving home his new bride along with a new team of mules. After a bit one of the mules balked. The farmer yelled out to the mule "That's number one!”. After a bit he got the team going again. Again the mule balks, and the farmer yells "That's two!" Finally he gets the team going again. The mule balks again, the farmer gets out his gun, shoots the mule and yells "That's number Three!".

His new bride protests loudly and says she cannot believe how cruel he is. The farmer yells back to her "That's number one!"   

DEAD MULE  
A preacher went to his church office on Monday morning and discovered a dead mule in the churchyard. He called the police.

Since there did not appear to be any foul play, the police referred the preacher to the health department. They said since there was no health threat that he should call the sanitation department.

The sanitation manager said he could not pick up the mule without authorization from the mayor.

Now the preacher knew the mayor and was not to eager to call him. The mayor had a bad temper and was generally hard to deal with, but the preacher called him anyway.

The mayor did not disappoint. He immediately began to rant and rave at the pastor and finally said, "Why did you call me anyway? Isn't it your job to bury the dead?"

The preacher paused for a brief prayer and asked the Lord to direct his response. He was led to say, "Yes, Mayor, it is my job to bury the dead, but I always like to notify the next of kin first!"  

Religious Mule
A man answered the ad in the paper of a mule FOR SALE from the monastery. The man was very impressed and purchased the mule. As he was leaving with the mule the monk told the buyer: "This mule is a religious mule, being raised here in the monastery. To get him to trot you just say, 'thank God.' If you wish him to gallop you say, 'thank God, thank God." And for real emergences you say, 'thank God, thank God, thank God.' "Well, thank you very much," said the buyer, as he headed for the gate. "OH! One more thing. To get him to stop you say, 'amen'" Called the monk to the man.

Well the man climbed on the back of the mule, and nudged him to get going. "He Ya!" The mule would not budge. "Giddy-yap!" Still nothing. Finally . . ."Thank God" The mule proceeded to trot on down the road. The man figured he would see how good this mule really was. "Thank God Thank God" That man sure had a tough time staying in the saddle. After he got used to it he decided to see what this mule could do. "Thank God, Thank God, Thank God" That mule flew down the street, faster than anything you have ever seen from an animal.. Up ahead he noticed a wide precipice. With no bridge. He pulled on the reigns in an attempt to get the mule to stop. It did not work. "WOAH!!" He called still not response. "STOP!! HEAL!! AHHHH!" Still no response the mule just kept on going. At the last possible moment he remembers "AMEN!" The mule stops just a breath short of the ravine. The man glances over the mules head looking deep into the gorge. He wipes his brow and says. "Whew! Thank God."  

Hunting Mule
Once this hunter got lost up in the foothills of north Georgia. He stumbled around a while until he came upon a farmer plowin with a mule. The hunter told him of his situation, and the farmer agreed to lead him back to civilization the next day. In the meantime the hunter asked if he might walk around awhile to see if he might scare up a few quail. The farmer said, "shore you can, but why don't you take my mule ole Blue here with ye. He shore does luv to hunt birds. Why he even out pointed some field champions a feller brought down here one time." Not wanting to insult the farmer by doubting his word, the hunter agreed to take the mule along. After walking only a few hundred yards the mule struck a point. The hunter, in disbelief, flushed the birds and shot one. By the end of the day the hunter had a sack full of birds. Totally shocked, the hunter returned and told the farmer that he would give him $5,000 for the mule. "Naw, I can't do it," said the farmer, "I jest can't part with that ole mule." "Well, I'll give you $10,000", said the hunter. "You jest don't understand what I'm tellin ya mister, I really can't part with that mule", the farmer replied. "Well this is my last offer, I'll give you $15,000 for the mule",the hunter said. "Looky here mister I'll give ye the critter." "What?" replied the hunter "I thought you couldn't part with that mule." "I really can't" the farmer said " but go ahead an takeim anyhow." So the hunter led the mule toward the bridge across the creek. When he got there the mule stopped, walked down by the creek and promptly stuck his head in. In just a minute or so the old mule threw a fish up on the bank. The hunter scratched his head and asked the farmer what the mule was up to. The old farmer just laughed and said, "Well, I toldja I couldn't part with that ole mule, every time I try ta cross the creek with em he does that, the best I can figer is, there's only one thang that mule luvs better'n bird huntin, and thats fishin!"    

The Mother-in-Law
A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately demanded an inspection of the place. The farmer had genuinely tried to be friendly to his new mother-in-law, hoping that it could be a friendly, non-antagonistic relationship. All to no avail though, as she kept nagging them at every opportunity, demanding changes, offering unwanted advice, and generally making life unbearable to the farmer and his new bride.

While they were walking through the barn, during the forced inspection, the farmer's mule suddenly reared up and kicked the mother-in-law in the head, killing her instantly. It was a shock to all no matter their feelings toward her demanding ways...

At the funeral service a few days later, the farmer stood near the casket and greeted folks as they walked by. The pastor noticed that whenever a woman would whisper something to the farmer, he would nod his head yes and say something.

 Whenever a man walked by and whispered to the farmer, however, he would shake his head no, and mumble a reply. Very curious as to this bizarre behavior, the pastor later asked the farmer what that was all about.

The farmer replied, "The women would say, 'What a terrible tragedy' and I would nod my head and say 'Yes, it was.' The men would then ask, 'Can I borrow that mule?' and I would shake my head and say, 'Can't, it's all booked up for a year.'"  

God created the mule, and told him: "You will be Mule, working constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy loads on your back. You will eat grass and you will lack intelligence. You will live for 50 years.
The mule answered: " To live like this for 50 years is too much. Please, give me no more than 20." And it was so.
Then God created the dog, and told him: "You will hold vigilance over the dwellings of Man, to whom you will be his greatest companion. You will eat his table scraps and live for 25 years."
And the dog responded: "Lord, to live 25 years as a dog is too much. Please, no more than 10 years." And it was so.
God then created the monkey, and told him: "You are Monkey. You will swing from tree to tree, acting like an idiot. You will be funny, and you shall live for 20 years."
And the monkey responded: "Lord, to live 20 years as the clown of the world is too much. Please, Lord, give me no more than 10 years." And it was so.
Finally, God created Man and told him: "You are Man, the only rational being that walks the earth. You will use your intelligence to have mastery over the creatures of the world. You will dominate the earth and live for 20 years."
And the man responded: "Lord, to be Man for only 20 years is too little. Please, Lord, give me the 20 years the mule refused, the 15 years the dog refused, and the ten years the monkey rejected." And it was so.
And so God made Man to live 20 years as a man, then marry and live 20 years like a mule working and carrying heavy loads on his back. Then, he is to have children and live 15 years as a dog, guarding his house and eating the leftovers after they empty the pantry; then, in his old age, to live 10 years as a monkey, acting like a clown to amuse his grandchildren.
And it was so.